Fast, wilted, and involving goat cheese

Ever since my friend shared a link to this Salon.com article on local pizza joints, I've been jonesing for my favorite Wichita pizza place, Knolla's.

To paraphrase, Anastacia Marx de Salcedo writes that since over 70% of pizza places in America are still locally owned, ordering large pie with extra anchovies is a tasty, effective way to stimulate the economy. De Salcedo argues that a pillar of indie pizza's success is the dough; no matter how hard pizza giants try to automate the process, customers still prefer dough that's made by hand. She says that if Americans were to double their annual pizza intake, the industry's spending on goods, services and wages would reach $172 billion.

Which brings me back to Knolla's. The workers make Knolla's dough by hand, using secrets the company's owners picked up from Sicilian pizza-makers in New York. They use whole-milk cheese, fresh spices, and The Tomato Sauce of the Gods. Put a slice of their Chicago-style cheese pizza in my hands and I'm a happy girl. My husband and I love Knolla's so much, that even though we live out of delivery range for every location, we're willing to drive to pick up our pizza. That's a big statement, considering we used to live within walking distance of five other pizza parlors.

However, as much as I would love to bring the economy back up to snuff, I can't eat Knolla's every day, every week of my life. My bank account and my waistline depend on restraint in this department. Vegetables must take precedence over Knolla's most of the time, but I still. Want. Pizza. most every day.

That's when I make the thin-crusted, veggie-laden wonder, the OMFG Pizza. It's full of ruffly chard, carmelly onions, roasty garlic, and salty goat cheese. It's easy on the eyes and the hips. Plus, the crunchy crust requires no making, no tossing, and comes in packs of 10 if you buy Mama Lupe's tortillas, made in beautiful Mound Ridge, Ks.

So, until I make it to Knolla's again, I'll be throwing this pizza together during the work week.

It's crispy, it's delicate, and it wards off vampires.

The quick-and-dirty, thin-crust pizza
also known as "The OMFG Pizza"

• 1 whole wheat tortilla, medium
• 1/4 cup marinara sauce* (I used vodka cream sauce)
  
• 1 tsp. olive oil
  
• 1 oz goat mozzarella
  
• 6 Greek olives, assorted and cut into thin slices
• three garlic cloves, cut into large chunks
• two or three green onions, sliced thinly
  
• 1 large leaf of chard, sliced into 1/2 inch strips.
  
• 1/4 tsp. each oregano and caraway
• 1 tsp. capers, if you like
  

Preheat your oven to 400 degrees Fahrenheit, then heat olive oil in a pan over medium heat. Saute the onion while you chop chard and garlic. Add garlic and saute for another minute while you lay the tortilla on a baking sheet. Smear the tortilla with marinara sauce to a 1/2 inch from the edges.

Toss chard on top of the onion and garlic, add a splash of water to the pan, and stir the veggies with a large spoon until the chard is lightly wilted. Don't overcook the chard, and remove the pan from heat as soon as it's begun to "soften" in texture.

Layer sauteed veggies and olives on the tortilla, then top with shredded mozzarella, oregano, and caraway. Toast that baby for 10 minutes and voila! C'est bien!